Forbidden Moves: 7 Taboo Ways to Build Trust in Bed

We’re told some things in the bedroom are off limits — too risky, too taboo. But the truth? Those “forbidden” moves might be the key to more trust, more intimacy, and more unforgettable connection.

In this episode of Talk Sex with Annette, I’m sharing 7 forbidden-ish intimacy moves that surprise, excite, and actually bring you closer. From consent contracts to mirror play to controlled pauses, these science-backed techniques turn taboo into trust.

This is also your Kinktober primer 🔒 — sign up for my e-newsletter (link in comments) for kinky guides, toy picks, and tutorials all month long.

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Chapters

• 0:00 New Show Intro: Talk Sex with Annette
• 2:21 Seven Forbidden Moves Introduction
• 4:05 Consent Contracts and Temperature Teasing
• 8:17 Light Restraint and Role Illusion
• 10:29 Forbidden Whispers and Mirror Play
• 12:14 Controlled Denial and Kinktober Challenge
• 14:14 Connect with Annette for Coaching

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:45

Do the sex. I'm Annette Benedetti, host of the podcast formerly known as Locker Room Talkin' Shots. The show has a new name Talk Sex with Annette, but at its core, this is still your locker room. It's where we strip away shame, get curious and speak the unspoken about sex, kink, dating, pleasure and desire. Around here, nothing's off limits. Pleasure and desire Around here, nothing's off limits. These are the kinds of conversations we save for our boldest group chats, our most trusted friends and, of course, the women's locker room. Think raw, honest and sometimes unapologetically raunchy. If you've been here from the beginning, thank you, and if you're new, welcome to my podcast, where desire meets disruption and pleasure becomes power. Now let's talk about sex Cheers.

Speaker 1: 1:37

Today's Talk Sex with Annette topic is seven forbidden moves that actually build more trust and give you more O's in the bedroom. You know what kills intimacy faster than bad technique it's playing it safe. We've been taught that certain things in the bedroom are off limits, too taboo, too risky, too out there. But here's the truth. Those so-called forbidden moves might actually be the key to creating more connection, more trust and more unforgettable intimacy. And here's the kicker this episode is your primer for Kinktober, also known as Locktober. Yep.

Speaker 1: 2:18

All October I'm going to be dropping kinky guides, tutorials and explorations that go way beyond the basics. If you want to get them, first make sure you're signed up for my e-newsletter. That's where I'll be sharing everything from spicy beginner guides to advanced deep dives, and you can sign up for my e-newsletter by scrolling down to the links in the description of this episode, and there you're going to find a link to my e-newsletter. But today I'm going to be giving you a grab bag of forbidden moves. Some are sensual, some are flirtatious and some are downright adventurous, but all are backed by science. And, the best part, you don't have to pick just one. You can add these in slowly, mix and match and see which ones make your intimate connection explode. But before we dive in, I want to remind you that I'm over on OnlyFans and there I am sharing my sex and intimacy demos, audio guided self-pleasure meditations and so much more. I am also now offering some one-on-one sex and intimacy coaching over on OnlyFans. If you are not ready to commit to a full coaching regimen, you can send me your one-off questions and get them answered there, so you can get there with my handle. At TalkSexWithAnnette, you can also scroll down and find a link to get you there. You can also find me over on Substack doing a whole lot of the same thing, minus the coaching. So you can find me there also by my handle at TalkSexWithAnette and again, scroll down and you're going to find me everywhere you want to find me in the links provided below.

Speaker 1: 4:01

But for now, let's dive in and get you started with some simple, entry-level forbidden moves that are guaranteed to level up your sex life, starting tonight, cheers. The first taboo move that is going to start adding some spice to your life and get it primed for Kingtober is the consent contract. Think of this as dirty talk meets a safety net. Before you touch anything, you both say what you want to try Maybe a little spice, maybe some gentle restraint, maybe just whispering fantasies you've never admitted out loud. Saying it first doesn't kill the vibe. It actually turns something that feels risky into something deliciously intentional. Something that feels risky into something deliciously intentional. It's like foreplay for the brain. So here's a tip If you don't know where to start. There are tons of consent contracts out there on the internet that list tons of play options, everything from vanilla to heavy kinkster. Just reading through the contract with each other can be an aphrodisiac, while giving you and your partner some inspiring ideas for ways to spice up your intimate life. Here's an important note Creating this contract should be a judgment-free zone. For instance, find out your partner has a foot fetish. Don't yuck their yum. Use it as an excuse to go get a new pedicure and explore their body with something other than your hands, or give them a plate. I'm not quite ready to go there yet. So the science behind why the consent contract is so exciting for a relationship is that explicit consent activates your prefrontal cortex, the decision making hub that reduces fear responses and lets the body focus on pleasure instead of defense.

Speaker 1: 5:59

So taboo move number two that is going to start lighting up your intimate life is temperature tease. There's nothing quite like running an ice cube across warm skin, then following it with the heat of your palm, or flip it. Use a warm washcloth and chase it with something cool. It's sensory whiplash in the best way. Start slow, let her skin adjust and watch goosebumps spread everywhere. Now here's one of my favorite tips. You can start by experimenting with a warm massage candle, like this pheromone-packed one from Eye of Love. It's called Matchmaker and I personally love it. The heat from the candle. Wax, combined with sensual touch is sure to spice things up. Try dripping the wax on the chest, the lower belly and the inner thighs, then let your hands do the exploration there. Add in a little ice play and you're bound to experience some explosive intimacy. The science behind why temperature play is so erotic is that thermal receptors in your skin respond most strongly to contrast. Cold and heat stimulate different neural pathways, making the sensation more vivid and unforgettable.

Speaker 1: 7:24

Forbidden taboo move. Number three that is sure to light up your playtime in bed is light sensory constraint. A silk scarf around the wrists, hands gently pinned above her head, that moment where she realizes she could move if she wants to, but chooses not to. It feels a little dangerous, but it's actually gentle. The thrill comes from surrendering just enough to feel safe and excited. So the science behind why this is so sexy is that safer restraint calms the nervous system in a similar way to weighted blankets, pairing vulnerability with comfort. The combo lowers cortisol, the stress hormone, and releases oxytocin. You get to start bonding.

Speaker 1: 8:14

Forbidden taboo move. Number four is roll illusion. Here's how you bring it into the bedroom. So slip into a different version of yourself for a night. Maybe you're the professor teaching a private lesson, or a stranger at the bar that she shouldn't be flirting with. You don't even need costumes, just shift your voice, attitude, eye contact or energy. It feels like stepping outside of the lines, which is why it's so intoxicating. So the reason why this late role play is so sexy and can start heating things up in bed is that role play activates the brain's mirror neurons, blurring imagination and reality. That overlap, boosts arousal and helps partners see each other in new, exciting ways.

Speaker 1: 9:08

Here's one of my hot tips for you. If you find role play awkward, intimidating, you feel silly trying to act like someone else. Try diving into maybe a different part of yourself. Do you act different in a professional setting, for example, if you have a management role at work, just step into that boss persona and bring it into the bedroom for a hot second. See how she reacts when you start giving her some order. Next thing you know she'll be applying to be your secretary. Yes, please.

Speaker 1: 9:45

The next taboo move to layer into your bedroom life is the forbidden whisper. There's power in a whisper. Lean in lips close to her ear and say something you've never said before or something she'd never expect to hear from you. A secret fantasy, a curious what if I did this to you? Or a desire you've been holding back. It's the contrast between secrecy and closeness that makes her shiver. So what's the science behind the forbidden whisper that makes it such a turn-on? Whispering stimulates the auditory cortex and the vagus nerve, creating a whole body response. Add in adrenaline and oxytocin and you've got intimacy that lingers long after Taboo move number six that's definitely going to next level.

Speaker 1: 10:41

Your intimate life is mirror play. Nothing feels more exposed or hotter than watching yourself get hot together in the mirror. The first glance feels taboo, like you've caught yourself doing something you shouldn't, but once you lean into it, you'll notice her expression, the way your bodies move together and a level of presence that's hard to find anywhere else. Now, why is this such a turn-on? Mirrors heighten self-awareness, which can amplify arousal when combined with touch. Psych studies show that shared exposure in safe conditions builds both vulnerability and trust, and nothing gives you bigger O's than trust in the bedroom.

Speaker 1: 11:30

And finally, we are to forbidden move number seven controlled denial, pause. Here's the ultimate tease. Start something sensual, get her breathing heavy and then pause just for a beat. Let her body hang in that space where she's begging for more and then dive back in the stop and go is what makes it irresistible. Tension release tension again. The science behind this is solid. Research on delayed gratification shows dopamine spikes higher when reward is delayed. That pause builds a bigger payoff. Anticipation literally wires the brain for stronger pleasure, and we all want stronger pleasure, right?

Speaker 1: 12:22

So here's your challenge as we move towards Kinktober pick one forbidden move from this list and try it tonight. And if you're serious about turning up the heat this fall, get on my newsletter list right now. I'll be sending out kinky guides all throughout Kinktober and you won't want to miss them. And look, I'm going to take this challenge a little bit further. Start mixing and matching these moves. See how they play out in one play session. Does she look at you differently afterwards? I'm betting she will.

Speaker 1: 12:58

You'll also learn a whole lot more about each other, and knowledge in a relationship in bed is power, and that power always converts to pleasure. Give it a try, tell me what you think. Make sure to drop a comment below this video if you're on my YouTube channel at TalkSexWithAnnette. If you're a listener, head on over there, drop your comment, or you can always send me your comments and thoughts to Annette at TalkSexWithAnnette. If you're a listener, head on over there, drop your comment, or you can always send me your comments and thoughts to annette at talksexwithannettecom. You can also scroll down to the notes section below and there you will find my speak pipe and you can send me a voicemail and I will get back to you as soon as possible.

Speaker 1: 13:35

If you are looking for a wing woman, a cheerleader or a coach in your intimate life, my books are open. Reach out to me at Annette at TalkSexWithAnnettecom. We'll set up a time to get together, and if you're not quite ready to commit to a full coaching regimen, head over to my OnlyFans page and there you're not only going to get my demos and my audio guided self-pleasure meditations that are all designed to bring more pleasure to your life. You're also going to have the opportunity for some really quick one-on-one coaching sessions. No commitment, big payoff. You can find me there at TalkSex with an F. So until next time, folks, I'll see you in the locker room. Cheers.