12 Sex Cues That Tell You Exactly How to Turn Her On

 In this episode, I break down 12 powerful sex cues that reveal exactly how to turn her on and keep the passion flowing. From deepening breaths and arching backs to subtle shifts in body language, I’ll teach you how to read her unspoken signals like a pro. Whether she’s melting into pleasure or silently signaling that something’s off, you'll learn how to respond in ways that build connection, trust, and unforgettable intimacy. Tune in to unlock the secrets her body is already telling you! 

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Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to Masturbation Monday
• 2:15 Reading Her Body Like a Sex Psychic
• 4:54 Positive Signs You're Doing It Right
• 9:52 Signs She's Not Enjoying Herself
• 14:47 Effective Communication During Intimacy
• 17:01 Closing Thoughts and Contact Information

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:44

do the sex. Welcome to Masturbation Monday with me, annette Benedetti, your host for Locker Room Talk and Chats. This is your invitation to join me for coffee in bed and a candid conversation about the masturbation practice I'm developing to support my mental, physical and emotional health and help manifest my dreams. Masturbation Monday is a guide to self-pleasure, better sex and using the power of the pussy to open new doors to a better life. Today's Masturbation Monday topic is the 12 sex cues that tell you how to turn her on, or how you're turning her off, in other words, how to read her body like a sex psychic. Today we are diving into a seriously game-changing skill that every guy should have in a sex toolbox how to read her body like a sex psychic. Now, if you've ever wished that you could unlock her deepest desires without having to say a word, you're in the right place. But don't worry, I'm not talking about mind reading here. I am talking about paying attention to these silent, subtle cues she's constantly giving you and, trust me, it's not as hard as it might sound. But before we dive in, I want to remind you that I'm over on OnlyFans and there I am sharing my sex and intimacy how-tos and explicit demonstrations, along with some audio guided self-pleasure meditations that are going to help you start experiencing more pleasure. Tonight you can also find me on Substack doing the same thing, and you can find me in both places using my handle at TalkSexWithAnA. You can also scroll down, where you will find the links you need to find me wherever you want to find me. All right before we dive in.

Speaker 1: 2:32

Here's the deal. Most men are focused on the big moments in bed getting to the orgasm or making everything seem exciting, but let me tell you the magic. It happens in those quiet little moments. It's in those subtle, silent signals that you can unlock a whole new level of intimacy. Research shows that women's arousal is often more internalized than men's. What does that mean? It means women express pleasure and desire through physical cues more than verbal ones. If you can learn to pick up on those cues, you're not just going to become a better lover, you're going to create a deeper connection with her. According to the Journal of Sex Research, nonverbal communication plays a huge role in sexual satisfaction. In fact, studies show that women rely on physical cues to express pleasure, discomfort or desire more often than any other verbal communication. This means, if you understand her body's signals, you not only improve the experience for her, but you also make her feel safer, more relaxed and more connected to you. That's what we're going to dive into today. Let's unlock the secrets of her body language. Let's get ready to talk about sex Cheers of her body language. Let's get ready to talk about sex Cheers. Now it's time to tap into your inner sex psychic. Here's where you can start reading her like an open book.

Speaker 1: 3:55

I'm going to break down the science into two categories signs that you're doing it right and signs that you're doing it wrong. But let's start with the positive. So one of the most obvious signs that you're doing it right is deepening breath and moans. When she starts breathing deeper, slow, steady breaths, paired with those low throaty moans, that's your green light, my friend. She's entering heightened state of pleasure. Keep doing what you're doing. You're on the right track. Research in the Journal of Sex Research supports that deep, rhythmic breathing is a clear sign of increased sexual arousal, indicating she's enjoying herself. Another sign that you are on the right track is that she starts arching her back. It's a classic. If she arches her back or tilts her hip upwards and towards you, it's her primal way of saying more please. It's a sign that she's ready for deeper penetration or stronger stimulation. This response aligns with studies showing that physical postures such as this are associated with increased pleasure and sexual arousal in women.

Speaker 1: 5:01

The next sign that you're doing it right is often misread. She becomes silent and very still. Silence can be golden If she goes completely, still, starts to hold her breath, seems like she's zoning out. She could be focusing on the building pleasure inside of her. She could be focusing on the building pleasure inside of her. Stay steady, stay consistent. She's probably about to reach the big moment. Studies show that many women become almost silent right before an orgasm as they concentrate on the sensations that are building up inside of her. I know that I do. This is not the time to stop and ask her what's wrong. Just stay in the moment with her and let her build and build to that beautiful orgasm.

Speaker 1: 5:49

Another common sign that things are going well in bed is she starts gripping or clenching. If she's gripping the sheets, clutching your body or even digging her fingernails into your skin, it's a sign you're on the right track. The 2014 study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that women who experience intense sexual pleasure are more likely to exhibit behaviors like clenching their fists or other muscle contractions as they approach orgasm. Another sign that things are going well in bed that is closely aligned to the gripping and clenching reflex is tension in her thighs and stomach. When her muscles start to contract, especially in her thighs, abdomen or core, it's a big sign that she's getting closer to orgasm. Keep your rhythm steady and maintain pressure. Research in the Journal of Sex Research confirms that muscle tension, particularly in the pelvic and abdominal muscles, is one of the most reliable physical indicators that a woman is reaching the peak of sexual pleasure.

Speaker 1: 6:53

Another indicator that you are on the right track in bed is flushed skin and goosebumps. If her skin turns pink or red, especially in the areas of the chest, neck or face, and you notice some goosebumps, it's a sign you are on the right track. That is her cue, that she is super turned on. Her body is overwhelmed in the best ways possible. Studies show that vasodilation the widening of blood vessels during arousal causes flushed skin, especially in areas like the chest, neck and face. Another closely related sign that you are doing what you should be doing in bed is that her lips will become wet and she may even start licking them. If she's licking her lips or they look extra wet and kissable, it's a sign of desire. She's craving connection and more intimacy. The Journal of Sexual Relationship Therapy highlights that moistening of the lips can indicate heightened sexual arousal, particularly when combined with other physical, nonverbal cues, like the deepening of her breath.

Speaker 1: 7:58

But the deepening of her breath isn't the only sign that you're on the right track. If you start hearing those little whimpers or sharp inhales, it's a sure sign you're doing something right. Those little whimpers or sharp inhales are delicate but powerful signs that she's feeling pleasure build up. This means she's fully engaged and your rhythm is working. Research indicates that involuntary vocalizations, such as moaning or gasping, are common when women approach orgasm. And finally, a surefire sign that you're killing it in bed is that she makes eye contact and there's smiling. When she locks eyes with you and grins during sex, it's a huge compliment. She's loving what you're doing and it's a clear signal that you're hitting all the right notes. Psychology Today notes that positive eye contact and smiling during intimate moments are strong indicators of emotional and physical connection and arousal. So now you've got a grab bag of some really good signs. You're on the right track.

Speaker 1: 9:03

So let's talk about the signs that you're not on the right track and you need to change up what you're doing. One of the biggest signs that you're on the wrong track in bed is she starts pulling away or tensing up. If her body stiffens and she starts pulling away from you or her breath becomes shallow, it's a clear sign that something's not working. Pause immediately and check in with her. It's a clear cue that she is not enjoying the moment. Research from the archives of sexual behavior reveal that women often withdraw physically when they are experiencing discomfort or disengagement during sex, and you don't want to continue if she's not enjoying herself. Another clear sign that things are not going well in bed is that she starts shifting and squirming, but not in the good way. If she starts adjusting her position or subtly moving your hand or body, but it feels like she's doing it to stop you, it could mean she's craving something different, maybe a softer touch or a change in rhythm. Pay attention to these movements. She's giving you non-verbal feedback that she's not feeling it.

Speaker 1: 10:09

The Journal of Sex Research highlights that women often make slight shifts in position to signal discomfort or need for a change in stimulation. A good example is if you are going down on a woman and she starts shifting her hips to the right or left. She may be trying to help you reposition your mouth to where her clit actually is. Another sign that things aren't going well in bed that could be a little bit confusing is that she starts avoiding eye contact or turning her head away from you. Now, obviously, there are times when a woman shuts her eyes and goes inside to really get into her body and feel pleasure, but this can also be a sign that she's not fully present or comfortable. If she is turning away from you or not looking you in the eyes at all, this can be a signal of discomfort or disconnection. It's time to press pause and check in with her feelings. Psychology of women's quarterly suggests that avoiding eye contact can indicate emotional withdrawal and dissatisfaction during sex.

Speaker 1: 11:13

Now indicate emotional withdrawal and dissatisfaction during sex Now, because this can also be a sign that she's turning inside and building towards orgasm. It's important to talk about what this really means to her. Either do that before sex or stop for a beat during sex to check in and say, hey, is this a good thing, is this a bad thing? And proceed from there. A really obvious sign that you're getting it wrong in bed is she starts crossing her legs or tightening her body. Crossing her legs or tightening up her body is a defensive posture. She may be uncomfortable, in pain, anxious or not enjoying herself. This is when you want to slow things down, back off a little and make sure she feels safe. Research in sex role shows that defensive postures like crossing arms or legs signals discomfort or desire to end the interaction.

Speaker 1: 12:13

Another fairly common sign that things aren't going right is lack of movement or engagement the dead fish syndrome. If she's laying still, staring blankly, not showing any signs of engagement, you might be doing something wrong, to check in with her to see if you need to shift gears. The Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy notes that lack of physical engagement could be an indicator of either boredom or dissatisfaction. And who wants to continue to engage in intimacy with someone who's not actually reciprocating the excitement? A sign that things are going poorly in bed that's the polar opposite of flushed skin is cold or damp skin. If her skin is cold to the touch or she starts sweating profusely in a way that feels uncomfortable, something might not be going right. Cold skin can be a sign of emotional withdrawal or discomfort, while excessive sweating can indicate stress or anxiety. The sexual health journal notes that unexpected temperature changes in the body can be a response to stress or discomfort during intimate moments. And finally, if her breath becomes shallow or she starts holding it for long periods of time, it might mean that she's getting tense or nervous, and is not necessarily aroused. This can happen if she's uncomfortable, stressed or unsure about what's happening.

Speaker 1: 13:41

You'll want to stop, ask her what's going on and maybe change things up. Research from the psychology of sex suggests that shallow breathing can indicate anxiety or discomfort, especially during heightened moments of intimacy. All right, now you know the signs that you're doing it right and you're doing it wrong of intimacy. All right, now you know the signs that you're doing it right and you're doing it wrong. So how can you make sure you're on the right track? Even the best sex psychics need some confirmation. So here's how you can make sure you're communicating effectively.

Speaker 1: 14:08

Number one ask simple yes or no questions Instead of asking broad questions like what do you want. Try simple yes or no questions. Do you like this? Do you want me to keep going? Is this hard enough? Is this soft enough? These questions are less likely to pull her out of the moment and put her in her head, while also giving you clear, immediate feedback.

Speaker 1: 14:29

Two use key phrases. Try whispering things like that feels good, doesn't it? Or you want more of this? These phrases not only affirm what you're doing, but they also give her an invitation to tell you what's working. Number three establish a safe word or signal For those moments when she needs a break or something isn't working. A safe word or signal is clutch. It allows her to communicate that she's not comfortable without disrupting the flow of the moment.

Speaker 1: 15:00

Look, the truth is that being a sex psychic is about being present, paying attention to her breathing, her body language and her energy. And when in doubt, just ask gentle questions and trust your instinct. The more you practice, the better you're going to get and the more confident you're both going to feel. So remember, great sex isn't about guessing. It's about listening with your eyes, your ears and your touch. Master the skill and you'll unlock a deeper connection and more pleasure than you ever thought possible. And if you are looking for someone to help you on your pleasure journey, whether it's with yourself or with a partner, if you want to become more confident in bed for your current or future partner or with your current partner.

Speaker 1: 15:48

My books are open and I would love to be your sidekick, your cheerleader, your guide on your intimacy journey. My sex and intimacy coaching books are open and you can contact me to find out more about that at Annette at TalkSexWithAnnettecom. You can also go to my website, which is TalkSexWithAnnettecom and find out more there. Now, if you have any questions, comments, input on what I've shared with you today, you know what to do. You can drop a comment below my video if you're watching this on YouTube, or you can email me at annette at talksexwithannettecom. You can also scroll down to my speak pipe link below where you can send me a voice message and I will do my best to get back to you as soon as possible. So until next time, I'll see you in the locker room. Cheers.