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XXX A Guide to Making Pegging Pleasurable for Her, Him & Them!

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Buckle up for this Anal August Special as we, Annette Benedetti and Russian Dominatrix Lucy, outline a guide to integrating pegging into your sex life. This episode is a treasure trove of insights for curious cock owners, hesitant vulva owners, and anyone in between. We break down how to get your partner on board for a pleasurable pegging session, warming up techniques, and how to make it feel good for all parties involved. So, whether you are completely new to this or looking to up your game, we've got you covered!

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Cheers!

Annette Benedetti:

Do the sex. Hi, this is Annette Benedetti, your hostess for a locker room talk and shots, the podcast that likes to think of itself as the queer NPR of raunchy women's sex talk. You are about to sit in on the kind of conversations women have on their girls' nights out or behind closed doors, while enjoying delicious drinks and dishing about sex. Think, fun, honest and feminist as fuck, and always with the goal of fighting the patriarchy. One orgasm at a time. Welcome to the locker room.

Annette Benedetti:

Today's locker room talk and shots triple X topic is an anal August special. That's a thing in the sex positive world. I don't remember it last year, but it came online for sure this year. I probably just wasn't paying attention last year. And so, in honor of anal August, happy August, everyone. Happy August.

Annette Benedetti:

That is Lucy. If you aren't familiar with her, you have not been around long. She is our resident Russian dominatrix. She's joining me today for anal August, which makes sense If you. I mean, didn't you do the podcast episode pegging in the patriarchy? We did, yes, packing in the patriarchy, so you're going to want to go back and listen to that one.

Annette Benedetti:

We are not covering the same shit today. We are going to be talking to you, if you happen to be a cock owner, about how to get your partner to peg you. Now, if you are a vulva owner or a woman who is, uh has subscribed, don't worry, I've got you covered. Uh, we have tips for you on how to make it work for you. I mean, like, if, if, for instance, the idea of pegging doesn't quite get you wet, we have some tips for how you can make it the best it can be for you, even enjoyable, maybe, something you learn to love, and certainly orgasm from Absolutely. So Lucy is joining me today and she's the perfect guest for this because she's done quite a bit of pegging. I have, yes, she has given us all lessons and but stuff in the past.

Annette Benedetti:

Um, so, speaking of that, if you want to honor anal August and really dive in to but stuff, we I have a podcast that I just released a handful of weeks ago, I think. Uh, that's been very popular, so I know you guys are all ass happy out there. Uh, it even talks about ask asm's, which are a thing as gazzams, um, so listen to that. Then you can scroll back even further where you will be able to listen to Lucy and I talk about pegging in the patriarchy and, of course, if you scroll down, you will find links to both of them.

Annette Benedetti:

But let's dive in. We are going to give you just hot tips, takeaways in this triple X topic. You're going to end this podcast with a whole bunch of good info that is going to lead to a spectacular pegging future for you and your partner, right? Uh, lucy and I are having breakfast and coffee together today. So, hey, lucy, let's uh cheers, cheers and just coffee and let's talk about butts. Hmm, all right, we're just going to run down.

Annette Benedetti:

What we want to do for you guys is give you tips. So if you're a dude and you're like I really just I want, I want to be pegged and I've talked to my partner and my partner is like we haven't done it before or they've done it, and they're kind of like it's not really my thing, I'll do it for you. Of course, most of us don't want uh, I'll do it for you. Response how can you work up to, to be, to making it like this amazing experience for both of you? Um, so we're just going to run down those tips. And if you're a woman and you're like my dude wants me to do this or somebody wants me to do this and it's not really your thing, or you're like I kind of want to try it out, but you've got weird feelings about it. You've got to try to strap on and make you feel strange. Well, we've got tips for you too, so let's just dive in. Lucy, do you want to start?

Lucy:

I'm not. I mean sure, let's go, um. So probably the first thing, as you know, pegging everybody does need to be on the same page that you are going to do it. Here you are, you have decided, um, and I think the greatest way to go is starting with your hand, actually using your hand and the dildo you prefer, starting small, obviously, and be prepared, perhaps a butt plug in there before the actual dildo, Um, and you can just watch the thing. The dildo of your choice go in and out of the anus to see what you think about that, just the visual aspect of it. I think that's a good starting point before you get strap-ons and all the other stuff Right figured out.

Annette Benedetti:

I think that is one of the first steps is like warm up with you don't have to go straight to like putting on a strap-on and like thrusting into someone's butt. If you're not ready for that, you can start with the excitement of putting even a small like a bullet vibrator into start and seeing how that excites your partner and gets them off or a you know using your hand with a dildo before you get into the whole thrusting motion.

Lucy:

Exactly, I do stretch before you start thrusting.

Annette Benedetti:

Okay, well, that's a good. I hadn't even thought about that Like. So I do. So I have definitely worn a dildo before. I haven't I would not say I've officially pegged with a strap-on before. I have pegged using my hand and a dildo where I was behind someone and I put the dildo cause I didn't have a strap-on all the time and then did this like thrusting motion and like pulling them into me, and that was actually a really hot way for me to start, and one of the reasons why I did that was because I've worn in the past a strap-on with another person with a vulva and I didn't feel sexy in it because it cut into my skin and, like any extra roll, it created rolls that weren't there or, if I happen you know, my hips like made them feel sausagey, and we'll get to that. Obviously. I think a really important piece for the vulva owner in this, who also wants to feel sexy, is finding a strap-on that makes you feel sexy.

Lucy:

Finding, you know, then they're all different types For sure, as well, as if you eventually graduate to lots of pegging activities, you can make one custom for yourself where you get all the measurements. That's one I have. You measure yourself and you send it on its way to the lovely people who make them custom made for you, and then no rolls anywhere are sticking out that you don't want. Since it is custom made for you, you look extra sexy.

Annette Benedetti:

Right. You want to find a strap-on that feels like lingerie when you are doing that kind of activity, and I think that that's really important while down the line, once you get into the pegging. There are all different types of strap-ons. There are underwear strap-ons that literally are like panties that hold firm to you that you can put a dildo in there's leather. Maybe that feels sexy against your skin. You can get them.

Lucy:

I'm sure there's latex one as well.

Annette Benedetti:

There are.

Lucy:

I have tried a latex one that did not feel super sexy to me, but some people might be into that Absolutely, and if you are handy with a rope, there is a number of Shibari ways you can do it as well.

Annette Benedetti:

Right and we won't get to talking about that. So maybe now is a great time. So you're not ready to go straight into the strap-on situation. You start with a dildo in your hand and then you can also look into before you strap it onto your own pelvic region. You can look into using rope, right, lucy?

Lucy:

Yeah you can also. You can probably just find some pictures and instructions online where you can strap on your strap on to your leg. I feel like that sounds peculiar. But yeah, so, and have your gentleman just kind of ride your leg, which can also be sexy and which also gives you more access to your vulva and that allows for. I mean, he can be giving you a hand job while his pegging himself on your leg.

Annette Benedetti:

Right, or you could be using a toy on your own vulva.

Lucy:

Oh, absolutely yeah.

Annette Benedetti:

While he was riding your leg. I think the other thing about that having it on your leg as opposed to your pelvis is you've got more power in your leg Cause, like one thing I do know from from having sex with women using my arm or what, and using a strap on is, oh my God, it's a lot of work, man. It's especially when it's a vulva owner who really loves a lot of penetration. It can really wear you out. Now it's a different situation with a butt, I'm sure, but having a strap on on your leg and the dildo on your leg, like your leg is gonna be a lot stronger.

Annette Benedetti:

For sure, you walk on it all the time, so using it to penetrate and do that sort of banging movement is gonna be a lot easier than a pelvic thrust.

Annette Benedetti:

It might be. It will be, yes. So that's another kind of way to do it that can feel sexy and exciting. But let's graduate to the actual strap. Now you've got a strap on, you're putting it on. You've hopefully chosen a strap on that feels sexy on your body. That is really gonna be in my experience I'm talking right now to the women out there and the men who love them.

Annette Benedetti:

I think one of the things I underestimated is how important it was for me to feel sexy in the strap on I was wearing. So you guys need to make sure, because it really can make or break your experience. I think you know I'm a very, like, sensory oriented person and sex is a very sensory oriented thing. I think it's really important to explore that and find something that feels sexy on you. I mean, the other thing I had to get used to as a pretty femme woman was I felt like the thrusting motion, pegging motion. There was something inherent in my body that felt like it was masculine, and so I had to kind of wrap my mind around. How do I still feel sexy doing this thing that I've been conditioned to think is a thing that a man does right, which is all. Again, if you've been listening to this podcast, this is all some bullshit conditioning.

Lucy:

Right.

Annette Benedetti:

And so, starting by finding a strap on that feels sexy on you, feels like lingerie on you, and then the other thing that I have enjoyed and I think it's really a good idea to start with if you're a woman and you aren't necessarily yet turned on fully by the idea of pegging is get a strap on and a dildo that has a bullet in it so that while you're pegging you're getting vibes and have a greater chance of not only getting excited and wet and having your clit, you know, played with, but you have a better chance of having an orgasm. And that's just a matter of conditioning there, right? You put the strap on, you get behind the person, you're looking at their butt, you're like associating that with the vibes and arousal and you get your orgasm.

Lucy:

Absolutely, and some of the nicer strap ons that you can get will have an attachment for the magic wand, like mine does.

Annette Benedetti:

I have seen that and I've never used one of those. So there are strap ons where you can actually put the magic wand in on your Right on your clit. Yeah, oh shit, Then you're definitely gonna have.

Lucy:

Absolutely, it works wonders. Highly recommend, but those are yeah, that is the one I have that is custom made. Right and a little pricier, but if you graduated, definitely buy one. Yeah, like for sure it's worth it.

Annette Benedetti:

And actually triple X or something. For you to know that I am starting this month, I will be sending you an article that has links to all of these products for you to check out. So you know, because I know it can feel overwhelming. I mean, it was for me to find good strap ons and to find good dildos and this kind of. I didn't even really know about this strap on with the wand option. So I will talk to Lucy after this and we will make sure to get you a link to be able to check it out and hopefully, some of these we will have some great discounts on for you as well. But that's awesome. Fuck. I'd be wanting to peg all the time if I had one.

Lucy:

It's fun, I think. Another interesting thing about pegging when you are trying to get into that whole situation if you do not like the horribly colored beige type that they insist on selling, feel free to like browse around and get some fun.

Annette Benedetti:

fun colors and Thunder shapes you're talking about the dildos that? They try, because they try to replicate the, the human Coloration, and they never do a good job.

Lucy:

It's creepy, it's, it is very creepy. It looks like a mannequin, it's just awful, but there's definitely some. If you, as a lady person, feel like that is not a representation of you, definitely dig around because there's so many versions and variations and calories, colorations that you can have. Link. My favorite is actually the unicorn horn dildo and I feel like the most empowered when I'm pegging with that one.

Annette Benedetti:

I have seen that. So this is really interesting, lucy, I had never sat and thought about the fact that I could choose a dildo based on what I feel would be a representation of my cock. How interesting. So that is maybe the best piece of advice we put out there, right like find the dildo that feels fun and good and Sexy to you. Because you're right like I think if I were to have A dildo that was one of those weird fleshy colored and like super realistic looking ones, it would feel weird on me. What I have is fun factories, pride, amour I love they have very Colorful of colorful rainbow colored dildos that I think feel really fun and sexy and like me, that's.

Annette Benedetti:

That's great advice. Fine, I find the cock that feels sexy on you.

Lucy:

Yeah or yeah or whatever color and Shape you prefer. I'm this is not an advertisement for bad drag. I'm being because they don't pay us, but they have some fantastic ones and I feel like they they are outrageous expensive, but the silicone quality that they use in and the firmness that they have, I feel like it is definitely superior to Almost all the other ones we have tried. And that's where the unicorn horn comes from.

Lucy:

Yeah, and I yeah, I have the full set, from the tiniest to the One that is practically um. It's just furniture or you can club people with it, in case you oh, beat them up.

Lucy:

And Lucy is gonna go straight home and take pictures and send them to me, and I will be sending pictures to you folks, so you can yeah, so yeah and they also are fun, because if you add some pizzazz to your room and have, like black lights, quite a few of them glow beautifully in those. So it gives you, you know, more pizzazz for your fun time.

Annette Benedetti:

Imagine pegging someone with the lights off and a glow in the dark cock, all right, so I'm just getting excited for myself. Black like you, gotta get a black light for your room. But I mean, as you can see, I think there are just so, so many ways to make it fun and sexy. One other Option and this does not work for me, so I'm putting it out for people out there who maybe it would there's always the double-sided dildo option. That's not worked for me or anything.

Lucy:

It hasn't worked for me either. I mean, I assume some people enjoyed, but I just like something about it. I'm like, no, that's a lot, go ahead.

Annette Benedetti:

I just like that's too much too much and then it's something going inside me and like there's there's a lot of possibility for pain in my, in my personal body If I'm trying to do angles?

Lucy:

never, it's not, it's just strangely incorrect.

Annette Benedetti:

All right, listeners. If you out there have used a double-sided dildo and you're like, yeah, no, it's wonderful, then message me. Message me, give me some tips. I am open to learning from you, annette, at she explores lifecom, I'm open to learning from you guys. So I think, to sum it up, do you have any last tips you want to give?

Lucy:

I Mean make it fun. You should always try to your best to make it as fun as possible. Wear the fancier lingerie, wear the strap on if you're feeling more sexy in a lingerie, and strap only. You don't have to be naked Some. Maybe you don't have to be naked at all. Maybe that is the appeal. You're completely dressed and they're completely naked and that is the appeal that you have like. Make sure you're also Getting as much fun as possible out of this situation.

Annette Benedetti:

I think that's like yeah, that is the most important part. Sex with your partner should be fun and your partner If you are in a long-term partnership you you're gonna have and you are being honest with each other about your sexual needs and desires and fantasies. You're gonna have times when there's things that your partner is interested in that are like, uh, I'm not really interested in that and, and I think as a good partner, being like, yeah, it doesn't sound like great to me, but I'll give it a go. And giving it a go means really giving it a go. You can't expect something. You try it once and it's gonna necessarily go off like perfectly, but really get, especially if it's something that they really want or need.

Annette Benedetti:

The bottom line is make it all fun, even if it's something that, down the line, you're like I'm not really into that, have fun with it. There are so many toys and tools and different ways of approaching it. Oh and of course we didn't say this. If you want to make it more comfortable for everyone, make sure to. I mean, go back and listen to, I think, both of the podcasts I mentioned before learning about how to clean yourself ahead of time so that the running into poop thing is less likely. I mean that's gonna lower stress all around doing the the the butt cleans ahead of time and I do give like explicit instructions about that in the past two podcasts and obviously I understand that that does happen, so have a box of baby wipes handing the general vicinity just in case in a towel yes, that's mindful.

Annette Benedetti:

An important tip. But also, if you're going to go I mean sex comes with body fluids and, like queefs and farts and any kind of butt play, you know there's going to be the possibility of a little bit of poo and you got to be an adult about it. So yeah, outside of that, if your partner wants you to peg them and you're a little iffy about it or don't know where to start, start with using handheld objects. Right, whether it's a dildo, a prostate massager, any number of toys, vibrating butt plug. Another thing that you can do is have your partner wear a vibrating butt plug. Will they have sex with you and start to get the feel of things? Then graduate.

Annette Benedetti:

You don't have to go straight, strapping it on your pelvis. You can strap it on your leg and let them ride your leg or arm or whatever you want to strap it onto right the leg is great for lots of reasons we mentioned. Then make sure when you're going to move to wearing a strap on, as a strap on on your pelvis like fine, one that makes you feel sexy, one that's comfortable, that doesn't like squeeze too tight, then look into the dildo that makes you feel good about you Put a bullet on the end of it Do a double-sided dildo rainbow colored, glow in the dark, unicorn, horn shaped.

Annette Benedetti:

You know that's the beauty of being a vulva owner your cock can look however you want it to and you can have multiple cocks.

Lucy:

You can, and if you're super ambitious, there are those services that you can. Actually, if you're like completely peculiar, like the rest of us, they can make a model of your partner's penis for you and you can totally bang them with their own cock. Holy shit, yeah, that's the thing.

Annette Benedetti:

I'm just going to let us end on that note. I feel like that should have come earlier in this podcast. Yeah, I totally just.

Lucy:

I just remember that. That's the thing.

Annette Benedetti:

That's why you can fuck your partner with their own cock, and I feel like now is the good time to say good night, folks.

Lucy:

Right.

Annette Benedetti:

Like. If you don't like that, if that doesn't turn you on, if that doesn't if not turn you on, peak your interest, then I don't know why you're subscribing.

Lucy:

There you go.

Annette Benedetti:

Oh, guys, I love these conversations, so listen, you guys know where to find me some things to look out for. In your email, you will be getting a article email with links to products and tips so that you can remember the tips, so that if you are going to start diving into getting any of the things you need to use to do the pegging or be pegged, it's not an overwhelming kind of situation for you. That will be coming your way along with pictures from our dear Lucy. These are only for subscribers and any kinds of discounts. I can find you because it's my way of saying thank you for supporting me. You can find me on Instagram, facebook Locker Room Talk and Shots. She explores live TikTok. Locker Room Talk and Shots podcast. Head over to YouTube and support me there. It's Annette Benedetti and, of course, you can follow me on my personal Instagram. It is being Benedetti and thank you, lucy. You're very welcome for joining me for butt stuff yet again. So until next time we'll see you in Locker Room.

Lucy:

Cheers.